Friday, August 22, 2008
If we are oppressed, or if we feel oppressed and feel poor, is it fair to swindle others? Below is one of the many notable responses to my posts. If you want to view the original posts, responses and the whole story, simply CLICK HERE.
Hi, As a foreigner married to a Filipina, I can sympathise with you, the young guy in Canada. I know Canada to be a place of relentless work for low pay, and cold-hearted company policies driven my the N American corporate moral-lacking ethic.
- -It is not those who are in poverty that I mind helping, it is finding out that the Phil family medical bills were based on ailments that were never treated, despite the med money sent over.
- -It is the spending of cash sent over, after a desperate plea for medical help, on a phone bill that is ten times what I pay in N America.
- -It is the second request for med money after the first has been spent on the phone, or other items, and the medical situation is used again to extract money.
- -It is the assumption that as I am a foreigner, I am rich, and therefore a bottomless pit that is used for money.
- -It is the guilt trips put upon my wife to get her to send her earnings over there, instead of paying bills here. In a 12 year marriage that has been a delight in all other respects, I have seen the following:
- -A $200 a month budget for family assistance exceeded by up to $400 a month as a regular thing.
- -The Phil family quit work of any kind, then manipulate to get the $200 budget increased by regular "emergencies" to maintain their retirement-My family here in N America increase its debt load by over 50,000 bucks, then file bankruptcy.-My personal pension fund get ransacked to the tune of over $30,000 dealing with bills created by budget overruns.-I have seen photos of DVD players in the background, when they were $400 items, and I could not afford one.-I have seen photos of parties, at times when I cannot afford a birthday gift, or even flowers, for my wife.- I have had a miserable Pinay individual who works at a local Walmart and who is a drug and alcohol user accuse me of being unreasonable as I married a Filipina, and part of that is that Filipinas have to send money home.-I have had the same individual accuse me publicly and at her workplace of being unreasonable for not liking the small of burning fish, and complaining about it, this being when relatives paid me the continual insult of selecting fish as a toasted offering inside my house at times when I had a day off, yet never when I was away at work.-I have today heard of a Filipina friend who currently on a visit home has had to go to her sisters house away from the city to avoid the relatives demands for money in large amounts, like amounts enough to buy cars, and then they get annoyed when refused.-I can with all honesty say that in the years I have been involved, there has not been one single transaction involving money that has been honestly presented.-Every demand or request for help has been later found to be based on a lie.-About a year or so ago I attempted to assist with finance for the starting of a business, and all that transpired in the end was that a PC was purchased, and then the relative involved informed me that the Internet Cafe business was no longer any good, and so he would not be going ahead with it. This was coupled with a photo a few weeks later of the same relative working at his PC, a dual-core Intel processor with illuminated Neon case. Meanwhile, I am STILL using a PC that is 7 years old.-This was followed some weeks later by the father of that same relative crowing about how well his son has done, and how his son has a better computer than we do.- We some years ago paid for a university course on computers for the same individual, in order to qualify him as having had continuous education since high school, and he decided it was better to take the course money and spend it. He then needed to pay the course (another 700 bucks the wife sent that I advised was throwing good money after bad) to get the paperwork, but by that time had been refused immigration. Tough, Eh? It would be interesting to contact the university and see how much the 700 outstanding tuition really was. Probably another theft of funds from the rich americans-I hate to say this, but if I had to do my life over again and went for a similar deal, I would make it clear: There will be no funds sent over at all, not a single penny, not for Christmas, none at all. No gifts that others, the recipients, decide what they are either. There would be a fund that will buy a second house in N America, and the rent once the house is fully paid for the rental income will be providing all sole funds after rental expenses. That way, right now, my wife would own a spare house that she can later rent out for her own retirement.-We borrowed the airfare from a friend so that the family could come over here to live, against my advice and judgment. I was wrong on one thing. They do actually work now that they are forced to, having come out of the Philippine retirement that I (my wife even more so) financed for all those years. But they find the work in North America hard, and so they will be returning. Not on my money they won't. They now have a problem, they owe a load of airfare money for getting here, and drink and smoke too much to save for their return. And no doubt I will be left maxxing out my credit card again, and taking more pension out to pay it down, just to pay off the airfare that was spent getting them here. But the goose has laid it's golden egg, and will lay no more.
Can you imagine that? How such a person can write that long only as a response to some posts? We can be poor but with dignity but that is not the case, because I myself see how my countrymen are. If they see a lighter color or anyone from outside the country, all they cna see is money. As long as someone is out of the Philippines, Pinoys think it's money. A big shame. A bad attitude!